Fairways and Friendships, Lessons Beyond the Score
Host Nathan James sits down with systems engineer and UMGC alumnus, Ben Thapa to trace the thread from Nepal to night classes, from a first IT role to a multi decade career built on routine, persistence, and family support. Ben explains how early mornings, long commutes, and library nights created momentum, and why staying curious kept opening doors at work and at school.
He shares the story behind playing golf in all 50 states and on every continent, including a bucket list swing in Antarctica, and how the real goal was never the scorecard but the friendships and check ins that followed. Along the way he highlights the master’s decision, the campus resources that helped, and a people first mindset that turns busy schedules into lasting community. Listen for lessons on structure, gratitude, and connection that apply far beyond the fairway.
Episode Information
Ben Thapa
We are all busy, right? Most of us are always busy and we have our own schedule, family doing things differently. All of us have that time for the people who you are connected with, right? Phone calls to messaging them, right. Just to have some indication. This is always meaningful, but this is always helping. I appreciate that.
Narrator
Welcome to the UMGC podcast Unstoppable Stories with your host,
Narrator
Nathan James.
Nathan James
Hello, everybody. Yes, I'm here with Ben Thapa. Ben is a systems engineer, is a Umkc grad, graduated with his bachelor's and his master's degree here. Actually, the master's was there back in 1999. So happy to have you here with us. He is also a lover of golf, a golf enthusiast, and of travel.
Nathan James
So we're going to jump into all of that. But first of all, Ben, thank you for being here and making time.
Ben Thapa
Thank you so much for having me on your show.
Nathan James
Absolutely. Yeah. Thanks, Ben. Wow. So, okay. I want to start with this. Obviously, you have a passion, for golf. You're an avid golfer, but you've combine that as well with traveling, across the country, even across the world as you golf. Right? And so, I if you could, you've traveled, I believe you said you've got in all 50 states.
Nathan James
Is that correct? Could you talk about that for a little bit?
Ben Thapa
Yeah, sure. Absolutely. So I, I love traveling right from the very young age. I travel in the fall. So that continued on my move to, in the States in 1989. So I, that I did it starting later 2011 through 2019. I, traveled to all 50 US capitals, as well, I'd say, actually, I so seven continents arrived.
Ben Thapa
So I did, So the the passion, you know, like a love of traveling and, so enjoy the traveling and the. You know, I'm an avid golfer. Enjoy. My first time playing golf was in 1993. Actually, when I was in the fall over here with a family vacation or a family reunion. And I just enjoy and enjoyed the walking and the course, seeing the greens and,
Ben Thapa
So coming. I'm coming from that. All right. So you have a big mountains, all this, the greens and white, all the everything. So just a open space. So this kind of combination, that's when I started playing golf. And combining the travel. That's how I, you know, started a golf, and that's where I met that passion is a combination of those.
Ben Thapa
Yeah.
Nathan James
Oh my goodness. Well, that sounds amazing. I'm trying to imagine I played a little bit of golf, but playing with the backdrop of, you know, mountains in the landscape in the Paul. I mean, that's got to be incredible. Nepal. I mean, that's where Mount Everest is, I think. Right.
Ben Thapa
That is correct. And Mount Everest, along with eight other, highest, peaks in the. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Nathan James
Oh, that's a I can't think of a better place to fall in love with a sport like golf, right? That's incredible. And. Okay. Were you a kid when you started playing as well, or were you there?
Ben Thapa
I was not the a kid. So actually, so I always did have a didn't have a whole lot of golf courses in, in the Paul Rice actually, like my very first golfer too. This started here, in the States, in Florida. So that was so I started in the when I was kind of, early 20s or in the, in teens.
Nathan James
Yeah, yeah. So. All right. You were born in Nepal, now you're in the States. How did that happen? What was the journey to get here?
Ben Thapa
I had a degree in Nepal from economics. I, but I always wanted to get other degree. You know, the more of the touring, looking at the future and researching, I thought computer would be the future. And then that's how I, I, you know, the the journey took me here in terms of, we were in a it was a 1991.
Ben Thapa
We were living in Takoma Park, Maryland. We had a small two story, colonial home and the the, you see, UMD scene. Right. So it was a just a mile and a half away. And for me, we are working, you know, people that we had a job in the during the day. So, so me being that close to the home, right, the for the mile and a half away and, DC what they did was, the great thing about it, they're looking at all of this, giving this, the working experience for the people.
Ben Thapa
That helped me a lot. Right. So in that way, getting my degree early, in the, earlier than I expected. And also, it it's a night, right. And I'm class. So I had all day long, you know, obviously during the day, I would I wouldn't be able to be if there was an all night class. Right. And DC had not offer, I wouldn't be here.
Ben Thapa
Right. I only getting my education right because I had my family to support. I would be working right. But, the combination of that is allowing me to work in the nighttime and giving me that opportunity to do this, my work experience, the credit to get me to, graduate to, So that is a combination I am very thankful for the, DC, in terms of, you know, the great professors, right?
Ben Thapa
They have a great, group of lab technicians, right? They're lab teachers. I spend them countless hours of the night, hours and hours. And they were, they're always helpful in terms of that. And that's why I, we I am here today because of all of their college support. And, you know, I've been obviously as a whole, it's a UMGC as an institute.
Nathan James
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We love the field of software engineering. You know, in it and, you know, I'm glad we were able to come alongside you, you know, and pursue that because you said even I think back when you were in Nepal, you were very much saw the computers was the future. You had your degree in economics and then, okay, you know, then computers.
Nathan James
And so okay, I'm just trying to track your journey here. So you're in Nepal, you get your degree in economics. Eventually you come over to stateside. Right. And that's where you interact with UMD. See, I, I'm, I'm just curious. The journey from across the ocean is never an easy thing. You know, people don't usually do that. Oh, just because they want to have fun, right, maestro?
Nathan James
I'm really interested in, like, what motivated you to say, okay, I'm going to leave my home country and I'm actually going to go, you know, and start a whole new life. I'm also curious about whether your family came with you or whether they stayed back, and what that was like to.
Ben Thapa
So, so I, I always wanted to get a degree. Right. In a better field. Right. The computer field. So what happened was, and the higher education getting in the US is, you know, in terms of compared to Nepal. Right, Nepal so much, much better. So I had the opportunity to, to go to school here, right?
Ben Thapa
I did so the transition was not easy. Definitely. It's not just that because I'm also I changed my, the, academic field right from economics to going to computer. All right. So, but I'm a structure person, you know, I work hard. Right? So from the very beginning, even, just a barrier in terms of the languages.
Ben Thapa
Right. But there are other other language, other barriers as well. But like I said, I'm a hard worker, right? I find what I need to do and I'm dedicate myself. Like I said, tongue, that almost ten years. I woke up in the 9:00. I'm sorry, 5:00 in the morning. I have the job. I was in Maryland, Takoma Park area job in, Arlington, Virginia.
Ben Thapa
Right. So I had to take my wife east. We used to have a one car. She used to drop me off at the bus stop. Then I went to to a train to get to the, Metro Center and then to the rising Arlington. So, you know, every day I did that system because I did undergraduate and graduate and.
Ben Thapa
Right. They took me last longer. The reason is, you know, obviously, I'm taking, just a two class, three classes at nine, right? Is I'm not a full time student. Right. So it took them up for forever, a long time. But then it was a, but the and I used to go right from the, from the school to, to, sorry.
Ben Thapa
My office to this school. So this you come home at 9:00 at 10:00, 1030 at night. So that used to be the norm, right. So but, I, you know, I wore calm and like I said, I'm a structure person, but I always, you know, you know, look at the end of the tunnel. Right. What if I work hard and if I dedicate myself, if I'm, everything.
Ben Thapa
So I knew, you know, I, you know, we can be successful and that's that's my that was my vision is always. Yeah.
Nathan James
Wow. Okay, okay. So what was it like for your family seeing you do this, right? I mean, I'm trying to imagine. Okay, if my little brother or if my son decided, okay, he's going to make this journey and he's going to go overseas to start this life. He's so passionate about the field of computer science. You're learning a new language.
Nathan James
What did they think about all of this?
Ben Thapa
So, it was a terrify them into, very hard, right meaning in terms of when he thought I was going, I was leaving. I also used to be, you know, a big part of when I was in Nepal and I was supporting all the my, not just my talents, but also supporting, helping my brothers, and the family overall.
Ben Thapa
And then when I left it, it was kind of kind of shocking for them. But they knew that.
Nathan James
Our very close, like close knit.
Ben Thapa
They were very close. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And when I, when I left and for them it was a big but they knew that I was going, I, I was always, you know, like I said, I work hard dedicated person. Right on overall. And they knew that I would do better. They they knew that I would not forget them.
Ben Thapa
So I've come because of that. You know. So I also started as soon as I was able to I started going to Nepal every year. But that didn't happen until I graduated from Bullock, the undergraduate graduate. And also, so that, you know, it was a hard but at the same time, you know, so they knew that I would actually help them, support them and come back to Nepal.
Ben Thapa
So that was, that way in. It worked out. Well.
Nathan James
That is wonderful. Now, you talked about visiting and then every year you work to that point to be able to do that. So that's great perseverance. I know that it's at least one point they were able to come overseas to visit you while you were working and studying. I know you talked about that a little bit.
Nathan James
Can you talk more about that for everybody listen to. Sure.
Ben Thapa
Absolutely. So it was in 1996, right. My parents, my parents visited us. They wanted to see their, grand daughter. My my oldest daughter was born and Monica was born, she was a one year old. So they came to see her and also see us. But at the same time, they're trying to help. Right. Health at anything.
Ben Thapa
They were, you know, at home. But. So when they saw me leaving 5:00 in the morning, right. Every day. Right. Going to work and would not come back every once in a while, I would come back right after work, like 530, just for 15 minutes. But most of the time I would go directly to my school, right. The for my I had the classes right, the two classes, but we had to take notes four times a week right at that time.
Ben Thapa
So. So I would come home around a lot on the clock. Right. So when they see me, not just the school for a 410 school night, you know, at 5:00 in the morning to 11. And then they saw me as working the doing the laundry right, cooking and cleaning all the work around the house. And my dad said, dinner.
Ben Thapa
This is too hard here in America. So you need to, you know, please come back to Nepal and we can help you. We have people working for us, right? We have, cleaning and cooking and doing everything in the house. So we come back to Nepal. We want to take care of our grand, granddaughter. We will take care of you, and you will not have to do anything.
Ben Thapa
So that's how he said it. So, coming from Nepal. But in response, you know, I said that, everybody works hard. You, I, we believe, you know, working hard and dedicated ourselves have that plan, right? We can be successful, right? Nobody here in this country, in the US, we have this luxury to have people working for you.
Ben Thapa
We do everything by ourself, right? So, like I said, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, everything. And, but I also mentioned that because we work hard and do everything ourself, we dedicate ourselves to do and so we can be successful, we will, you know, people can be successful. That's what we look for. You know, so he is smile.
Ben Thapa
And he said, he said, thank you. And so that's how it was for for them to come to us to see your son or daughter in law working that hard and that they said, you know, it's too hard. Come back to our in the past. Yeah.
Nathan James
By the way, folks, once again, you're listening to Unstoppable Stories, with Ben Thapa. And if you want to hear more stories like Ben's, just remember to, to, like, subscribe, to keep the content coming. So, Okay, Ben. So, like, you explain to your parents, right? Hey, you know, this is hard work, but this is what folks do in this country.
Nathan James
I've got these goals. I'm going to continue to go for those goals. So you continue on with your schooling and your working. And it very, you know, intense pace, and eventually I think you're pursuing your bachelor's degree at that time. If I'm not wrong, that was actually okay. Okay. And so eventually you did. You know, you're with us at UMGC.
Nathan James
Eventually you finished your degree. And like you said, you had a great experience. But what did it feel like to finally cross the finish line? For your for your first degree at UMGC after all the work you put in?
Ben Thapa
Yeah. So that's this was, the the, pretty special. Right. So my I can remember when I finished my degree, very first degree. Right. My mother in law and we have all the family members just came in to in my graduation. She was and I thought my parents couldn't come from the pool at the time, but, when I graduated, my mother in law and father members, they there.
Ben Thapa
My mother in law was very proud. And I'm also always remember that. So in terms of, getting that, tech degree and, you know, so I once I had that degree because that degree I was able to get my first IT degree IT job in the field. So that was special for me. It that was special, you know.
Ben Thapa
So I was working before. Right. But not in the it, you know, till but as soon as I got my degree, my first and I landed my first job in i.t film and, Yeah. And ever since I've been working for, it's a fortune 500 company. It's been all over 30 years. I have been working, and,
Ben Thapa
Yeah. So it's even I've been working in the one company. But however, I do don't do the same job, right. You know, different field system injury in different parts, different project. Right. So it always feels kind of it doesn't feel the same job. Right. So, different role. Different than, you know, but, it. Yeah, I'm just she was a big part of landing my face it job.
Ben Thapa
Yeah.
Nathan James
I've looked it up. It was a bachelor's degree in systems analysis and and design, I believe. Right.
Ben Thapa
Yeah. So yeah. So my undergraduate degree was information system management. Yep. And my and yeah, my undergraduate degree was in the computer system management. Yeah. That was, that was in 1999. Correct.
Nathan James
Okay okay. Yeah. So all right. And 96 you earn your bachelor's degree, which is great. That leads you to your first IT job here in the States. Phenomenal. A lot of folks might say, okay, great. You earned your bachelor's degree. You got your dream job. You're good to go. You can kind of coast from there. But you decided to then go ahead for a master's degree.
Nathan James
Keep it going. Why did you decide to go for the master's degree when you already had your job?
Ben Thapa
Yeah. So what? They know so that, you know, higher education, you know, it's still now it is right at the time. You you know, you if you're in a job, you had a better opportunity that also one of the criteria they take you to promote you or, you know, give him the the other, you know, the job, right?
Ben Thapa
They had the opportunity. But I also wanted to also finish my master's degree. It's not just, so the combination of that and when I was continue on, I had the desire to finish and then, you know. Yeah, you know, the more and I wanted to continue to say in his mind. Right. That's, Yeah. So and it was, you know, for me that I this is still harder, but I finish living earlier than I expected because I took a more little longer class even, even in the summertime.
Ben Thapa
And I did. Yeah.
Nathan James
Yeah. That's phenomenal. I mean, that is a, a big decision to go ahead with your master's degree, especially when you're working, full time already. And not only that, but you're also a family man, right? You had at least one child at. Yeah.
Ben Thapa
At that time.
Nathan James
Now. Yeah.
Ben Thapa
Yeah. I mean, at that time I had, 96. I had a one in my mind ago. I had, in by 99. But guys, I had a second. I had also had two others. So I had I have a three year.
Nathan James
So now I'm talking about a rapidly growing family.
Ben Thapa
Yeah. I think as you're.
Nathan James
Finishing out your masters.
Ben Thapa
Yeah. But I want to also my. Yeah. And also, my thank you for my, my wife, she was a big, big, big part of the because I was, I would spend so much time at the library or, you know, lab or one big library. And even there.
Nathan James
I know I studied there. Yeah.
Ben Thapa
Okay. There you go. Yeah, yeah. So, so I spent a lot of time in the library, right. And or the computer lab and getting the all this project, learning, asking. I know, I and but I also, you know, work with a professional if anything there. We need to. So I always communicated with them. Right. So, at that time.
Ben Thapa
Yeah. So it was a, you know, you know, and everything I was doing, you know, spending a lot of time in a job, not the job. Job as well, obviously. And but the school but my wife, she was able to, take care of our three young kids, you know, so I always appreciated that. And because of that, that is also, very, very helpful.
Ben Thapa
And that's where I am here today as well. Yeah.
Nathan James
And the kids got to see their dad across the stage. Yeah, they may have been pretty little, but they still saw. Wow. That's great. I mean, I've noticed a lot of guests that have come on and even learners and students that I've talked with, the importance of having a strong support system always comes up. Yeah, always comes up.
Nathan James
And for you, your wife was has been phenomenal. Thank.
Ben Thapa
You. Thank you very much. I so want to add one more thing here. So once we, we moved in Virginia after I graduated from there. Right. I always have a job in Virginia, so I was commute was a very, you know, they had some every day, like an hour and a half just to come and go home to Virginia.
Nathan James
Yeah. Traffic is really bad right around that area.
Ben Thapa
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, so as soon as we came here to I had finished my degree, right. And I had my focus was obviously job and me. Right. But ever since that I was able to spend time with my kids and doing all their active sports activities and everything. And so I was able to do whatever I was not able to do in Maryland when I was in school and job, I was able to do everything.
Ben Thapa
You know, I couldn't spend time with my kids, time our kids, and going to the sports and health, helping academically or anything I could do. And I was able to do after I graduated from college. Yeah.
Nathan James
So there was sacrifice with the bachelor's and the masters and solidifying your IT career. But after that master's degree, it opened up plenty of time, right, for you to be the family man that you just described. And. And on top of that, I think that's when you started visiting your family back in the Paul annually as well.
Ben Thapa
So that is correct.
Nathan James
Yeah. Wow. That's a big payoff. That's really special. So okay, let's circle to, the golf and and traveling again. What our, guests don't know. I mean, what our audience doesn't know quite yet is that you are an author as well. Having written a book, actually, about your journey and your passion for golf and traveling to, and, what's the book called again?
Nathan James
Been.
Ben Thapa
My journey.
Nathan James
Yes. Your golf journey. And so you you're an accomplished author as well. But I'm sure your book covers a lot of these themes, but, talk about what it's been like to take your passion for golfing all over the country, all over the world. And why you do that?
Ben Thapa
Okay. So thank you so much. So I started, you know, after the graduated from college, right. And not for my kids, for any honor. And then, I started in a 2011 to 2019, I traveled to all the 50 U.S. capitals. Ryan, the golf, the passion. Like the. And, you know, so I would like to say I enjoy golf.
Ben Thapa
I'm a avid golfer, but, but having that, I also love traveling from the very young age. Right. So when I played my first golf with my father and Victor and also my, you know, brother in law's, Sandy and, Jeff, we played first hand in the Floyd. And then they were very supportive. Right?
Ben Thapa
They were very helpful. And they're very encouraging. Right. So and I also enjoy walking on the course like open seal right there. Right. So it's the same thing coming from the far right. Do you have a big open space mountains, trees and you know, so I feel the kind of like a home right. Or family, you know. So I enjoy that.
Ben Thapa
So ever since I began enjoy, you know, golf. And then I started playing and now so I started in 2011 to 2019, all 50 as capitals. I also in India. How about that? Is that is that is the correct eight years?
Nathan James
Expand on that. That's impressive. Yeah. Yeah. And then go ahead and. Wow. Okay.
Ben Thapa
Sorry. Yeah. And then within that down. So I visited when I went to all this, capital golf courses. I also if you didn't the capital those capital, the buildings in these, estate. But I also did in Antarctica. Right. So I did Antarctica is one of the last I mean, in the seventh continent. So, I was also able to go there to Antarctica in 2013, and, I was able to play a golf in another.
Ben Thapa
There's no golf courses in Antarctica. Right. Just the idea have to have needed to have a seven continents. I was it was a mars. 1213 March 15th. I was in the perfect, point. That is a one of the landings. I was and I was able to bring I had my golf, clubs, a yellow golf balls and, you know, and glove and everything.
Ben Thapa
And so I was able to hit some balls and, you know, I'm able to. So I was that was a special for me.
Nathan James
Ben. Oh my goodness. Oh, folks, you heard that correct. Just to make sure we have been who golfed in all seven continents, including Antarctica. Yeah, yeah. That's true. And, I'm sure you did it with gloves.
Ben Thapa
Yeah.
Nathan James
I mean, that's, we had, a student, a learner who was on a previous episode who said it was so cold that if you were in Antarctica, he studied there and, with us, and he mentioned that you could even wipe your eyebrow if you were careful. You just wipe your IRA because. Yeah. Yeah, right. All that's all cold was.
Nathan James
I'm trying to imagine golfing in that temperature. Must have been something else. I'm sure you didn't. You won't be forgetting that anytime soon.
Ben Thapa
No, no.
Nathan James
Well, I've heard you talk about how the traveling and the golf is very special. And obviously seeing the different, you know, special sights and, like you said, the capitals and the architecture. But you talked about the relationships you formed around the nation and around the world, as well as being extra special. Could you talk?
Nathan James
I just want you to give you the give you the mic to talk about that, too.
Ben Thapa
Absolutely, absolutely. So so it's not about just all my traveling and enjoying playing golf, right? My main, passion is to meet people from, the different parts of the country, different parts of the world. And that's what I have been doing. That's my passion. That's why I have been doing so. I, just to I travel, 64 countries.
Ben Thapa
So I have traveled to 64 countries and, and four countries. Out of those 64 countries, I did play golf in the 50. Right. So I am one of those, just so I'm easy to talk to, right. And reach out to people. Right. I when I go on a golf course and I don't, my main focus is to enjoy the golf meeting people.
Ben Thapa
Right. Talking to them. Not necessarily. I need to have a great round. Right. I need to pay that. That's not the my, The what? My journey is about, right? In just a meeting. The tour, I, I just so once I'm done with them, I'm always keeping tabs. Meaning in terms of that we see our contact information I use there's a different, you know, but I use a WhatsApp to, to keep in touch with all of them, right out of 65 countries I did, there are 50, countries I play.
Ben Thapa
I keep in touch with all of them, not just so that you're not just a one player, right? There's a golf usually have a 2 or 3 three player support players. We need to play. So I keep in touch with all of them and whenever they're saying that. So it's, my mission is my passion is just to meeting and then having that, you know, connection with the people around the world, learning their culture and learning about the country.
Ben Thapa
Right. So after that, I just and and they, they come here to visit me. Right? So it's not just that I'm going there playing, but I invite them all here. Right. Same thing right here in the U.S.. I invite all the people here. And that's who I played along with all the countries and outside. So whenever they come, we play here.
Ben Thapa
Right. So there's a gentleman he came from, the swamp. Robert was here in last year. We played golf here with him, you know, I know we met. We, the the time, the. So it's just a kind of that connection. And even from. So, just a just a it's not just the playing golf or the play traveling.
Ben Thapa
It's a more for meeting, having that connection. Yeah.
Nathan James
That highlights the importance of connection, the importance of not being alone. Right. I think recently it was said in America there's a bit of an epidemic of loneliness. Right. And so you actually can use your golf when you're traveling to build incredible connections. And that's, that's what you've done for many years now, and I'm sure you'll continue to do, let me ask you this.
Nathan James
We can wrap up with this question, if you wanted to, give any advice, to our listeners about the importance of, connecting with others and making space in the busyness of life to do that, for happiness and fulfillment. What would you.
Ben Thapa
Say? Just, I always that we are always busy, right? Most of us are always busy, and we have our own schedule or family do things, things differently. But I, you know, we should, all right? And we should always have that, you know, time for the people who you are connected with right now. And, you know, we are busy, but that is some phone calls, right, to messaging them.
Ben Thapa
Right? Just to have a conversation about company communication. That means a lot. Right? So we should always think about that. Let's say, you know my family, right? My parents or my the people who I am busy. So let's see, I had just, we have this in Jamaica. We have this, hurricane, and the people are devastated. There's so much going on there, guys.
Ben Thapa
I have to say, I know people there. I have played golf with them. Right. So I reached out to 2 or 3 of them and say, hey, just want to make sure you, you guys are okay. How are things going? All the things. Right? So those kind of little things. Right. Just, having that, just like we should always had that time and to get, you know, you know, to communicate with people have, you know, give them a call, right?
Ben Thapa
You know, talk to them. So this is always kind of, this is always, meaningful and this is always help. And they, you know, they appreciate that. Yeah.
Nathan James
We're grateful for you, Ben. We're thankful for the time that you have spent with us. This has been fun and really cool. Thank you for this. Thank you. And thank you. Audience. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Thank you, everybody, for listening and for watching too. Great to have you. Just remember, to like and subscribe, to see more unstoppable stories.
Nathan James
Remember, also, you can catch up on previous seasons or episodes, okay, on your preferred podcast channel. So, until then, we'll we'll see you next time.